Being kind to yourself is the essence of Boadicea Brown, my blog and therefore becoming a part of me.  Over the last while I have found that giving myself a break, when it’s all too much, is the key to my happiness.  Maybe you are one of life’s lucky ones who has a very healthy positive internal chatter, which we could all benefit from hearing.  In my case, I am not so blessed.  For those of you who don’t know what it is like, imagine going about your day with someone standing next you shouting at you about all the things you are doing wrong, pointing out all your mistakes as you do them and criticising the way you look, the way you feel, what you say…..it is utterly exhausting and can quite literally put you on edge.

Real Commitment

When you have an innate ability to be so self-critical, changing this pattern is near to impossible.  First you need to be aware that you are doing this to yourself.  Second you need to have the desire and motivation to change.  This takes real commitment, there is no overnight quick fix.  Finally you need to catch yourself in the act and deliberately turn your current thought into something positive.  I was quite good at recognising my thought pattern but turning it into something palatable was the tricky part.  I encountered resistance and was very uncomfortable   The internal battle I felt as I didn’t deserve to give myself a compliment.  It was somehow egotistical or arrogant of me.  People might somehow sense and be deterred, as though I thought too highly of myself.

Negative Nancy

Today I have a repertoire of little mantras which run along the lines of:  I am a nice person and I am coming from a good place. I can do this, I have overcome bigger challenges than this before.  I may not have the perfect body but it’s got me through 40 years, 2 children and cancer, it could be a lot worse.  While I won’t win any awards for most positive affirmations, these seem to be effective enough to halt Negative Nancy in her tracks and reset to something bigger, better and more deserving.  So my challenge to you is can you tell me 5 things you can celebrate about yourself?  Please share, we could all do with some more sunshine in our lives.  Here are mine to get you started (and yes I still find this very uncomfortable to do):

  1. I am honest
  2. I am loyal
  3. My calves still rock at 40
  4. When all else fails I can make you laugh
  5. I love helping others

Over to you…….

xxx

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