Just think, as my brother would say, in 2 days time I will be unconscious on an operating table. So from the day of diagnosis to operating will have taken 2 weeks to the day. In 2 weeks I have had to listen to words I didn’t even understand, make some awful but life saving decisions, read some confronting literature, see pictures I can never erase from my mind, begin to plan my recovery, discuss my diagnosis with daycare, school, GP and Psychiatrist to ensure we have enough… support to get us through this.

Luckily we had a family trip booked which has done much to lift our spirits and really allowed us to connect before we take a forced break from each other. So much has happened, yet so little time has gone by. Then it is in the most unexpected times, like in the queue buying your groceries, or at the traffic lights, or when you see a beautiful lady wearing a beautiful dress that you may never be able to do, that the enormity of this hits. But right now my biggest fear is that I will not make it through surgery and I will have left my kids and husband well before they deserve. Apparently the chances of this happening are tiny, but that does not make it any less real to me.

Did you know that 1 in 4 people (in the UK and Australia) will experience anxiety each year and one-fifth do nothing to cope with these feelings. So this means that you could be with someone, or you might be experiencing feelings of anxiety. The most commonly used strategies are talking to a friend, going for a walk or exercise. So what if the person next you feels some intense emotions, or is worried about finances, what the future holds, or just has an unexplained feeling, and they haven’t said anything. They might be suffering in silence, and you reaching out to them could be that trigger for change and knowing that they had your support might mean they get help. Many who sufer with anxiety say this has stopped them from doing things in their lives. How sad it would be to get to the end of our time here and we could not live the life we wanted to lead, or be the person we wanted to be?

Taking a breath and sharing might be the bravest and greatest thing you do in your life…….you are not weird, your a not wrong, your are not alone. Seek help, because I guarantee you, you will be surprised by the people who love you, and they will see the greatness in you, that you cannot see right now.

Love you all xxx

Spread the love